Emotions Surging

This post is not for the Gloomy or Already Depressed ppl.

Got back my ahdis and bpharm results on mon, failed bpharm quiz and now failed de term tests. Disappointed of course. I deserved some marks but I did not get. I got no way to get, she's de marker, shes de setter, shes de teacher.

Damn down now.. So low so low. Walked out to take a toilet break and realised, how cold de wind is blowing especially tonight. How hurting de heart is, but deres night when its worst.

Seem to had raised my voice at my father for sth which is trival, felt bad abt it. I shld not drag some1 innocent down. I despised myself for not able to control my emotions.

Found out sth which I longed wish to happen to me, but happened to some1 else instead. Jealous or Envious, I'll say both with abit more of jealousy. How I wish it was me instead. Its like U wish to be an actor for a long long time, but in de end u turn out to be de manager of de actor. Sounds like a big role, but its bullshit. Hu will shout " Hey!! Its de manager of the !!" So.. ya.. jealous and envious.

Stm I wish the Emo Bug will not infect me. I hate to be emo! I hate to be Emo!!! I rather be high and drunk!! At least, I get to 4get hu I am, and be wad I am. If U understand wad dat means..

Everybody is wearing a mask, no matter where dey r or hu dey r. De only time de mask gets to be removed is when alone or when drunk/high. Not talking about skincare masks, or ultraman paper mask. Its de mask of Impression. Its a mask which u use to impress huever u wish to impress. And dis mask is not made of metal,plastic,paper or rubber. Its made of ur imagination of how u think ppl will look at u. Sometimes de mask is so firm dat it can not be removed and U will cheat urself and others into thinking dats ur face. Sometimes de mask is so everchanging dat it changes to diff ppl and situation aka Hypocrism. Sometimes, de mask is so thin and unsecured dat it keeps falling off, but it will Always be picked up and wore again even if it means duplicating some1 else mask to wear. In short, nobody is w/o a mask. Just dat, What is urs?

Living Life Like Lies
-Seraphi aka Shawn-